Still unsure how to play this game of wank? Tired of the endless content saying PICK X or SUBSCRIBE TO Y? Do you even know what a fucking chip is? Let’s dive in. PICK PLAYERS WHO START FOOTBALL MATCHES This sounds simple, but you’d be surprised how many people like to plug maverick xMinute risks…
Can you really take punts on players even when the season hasn’t started yet? I certainly wouldn’t have thought so, but this is a new season and as we’ve learnt over the summer with the changes that have been made to the Fantasy Premier League game, anything is possible. Well, if you want to target…
Way back when FPL Towers came out and announced the new changes to the Fantasy Premier League game for the 2024/25 campaign. One change stood out the most: Erling Haaland being priced at £15 million. Due to the amount of FPL money you will have to lay out on the Norwegian, it gives FPL managers…
Confused by the choice available to you this season for your FPL midfielders slots? Well, look no further, because this guide will help you imagine them as cheeses. So just pick the ones you want to eat the most! Unless you’re a vegan or hate cheese, in which case, I dunno, play Sorare. Or fantasy…
It’s over. It’s done. Let us see what XI luminaries made their way into the FPL Team of the Weak. The end of the season edition. All visuals by the absolutely wonderful @fpldoodles1 – a light in the FPL community of fucking blackness. Let’s dive the hell in. One. Last. Time. EDERSON Still a member…
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. But enough about watching Manchester United, try doing that whilst owning their defenders in FPL as well. Like turning up to a live torture event and saying PICK ME! Fuck this shit, let’s dive in to the Gameweek 36 wreckage. ONANA – 5.0 – MANCHESTER UTD Who…
Imagine waiting 35 weeks to play a wildcard for this tornado of horseshit. Players going down like they’re in Enemy of the fucking Gates the second they enter my team. Let’s dive in before two more get bloody snipered in Gameweek 35. EDERSON – 5.5 – MANCHESTER CITY I’ve been burnt by the Wildcard/Bench Boost…
What is left at this point, but to pick ourselves off the turf and somehow find a way to keep going in the face of such reckless shite. Deep breath. Let’s dive in and try and forget any of this ever happened in Gameweek 33. MURIC – 4.3 – BURNLEY Burnley have had half the…
GAMEWEEK 30’S PISS POOR THINGS I hope you all had a good Easter, sat there with your fucking roasts, chocolate and FPL points whilst some people died on the fucking cross and got none. They also didn’t get the Team of the Weak article for Gameweek 30, either. Let’s do this. LENO – 4.8 –…
KILLING OF THE CARLTON MOON Well I’m back, said Samwise Gamgee after his adventures in Middle Earth. Going to talk to you about Gameweek 29’s Team of the Weak. And so am I. Let’s dive the hell in. DUBRAVKA – 4.2 – NEWCASTLE UTD Inspiring as much confidence in the troops as General Custer on…
