Imagine waiting 35 weeks to play a wildcard for this tornado of horseshit. Players going down like they’re in Enemy of the fucking Gates the second they enter my team. Let’s dive in before two more get bloody snipered in Gameweek 35. EDERSON – 5.5 – MANCHESTER CITY I’ve been burnt by the Wildcard/Bench Boost…
What is left at this point, but to pick ourselves off the turf and somehow find a way to keep going in the face of such reckless shite. Deep breath. Let’s dive in and try and forget any of this ever happened in Gameweek 33. MURIC – 4.3 – BURNLEY Burnley have had half the…
GAMEWEEK 30’S PISS POOR THINGS I hope you all had a good Easter, sat there with your fucking roasts, chocolate and FPL points whilst some people died on the fucking cross and got none. They also didn’t get the Team of the Weak article for Gameweek 30, either. Let’s do this. LENO – 4.8 –…
KILLING OF THE CARLTON MOON Well I’m back, said Samwise Gamgee after his adventures in Middle Earth. Going to talk to you about Gameweek 29’s Team of the Weak. And so am I. Let’s dive the hell in. DUBRAVKA – 4.2 – NEWCASTLE UTD Inspiring as much confidence in the troops as General Custer on…
Which players promised us so much this season… and have thus far delivered nothing but a fistful of faeces. Let’s rubber up, and dive the hell in to FPL TEAM OF THE WEAK – THE FIRST HALF. FLEKKEN – 4.5 – BRENTFORD Ranked top of Eric Freeman’s GKs for this season, Flekken has been so…
The phrase ‘When it rains, it pours’ perfectly describes the scenario of the Fantasy Premier League (FPL) landscape heading into Gameweek 17. Several players have been injured or suspended amidst the looming blank Gameweek 18 for Manchester City and Brentford. This has left FPL managers in a sticky situation. Erling Haaland mysteriously missed the game…
A seasonal banquet of bastardness. Join me in unwrapping this lump of coal, soaked in shit and fisted northward until you vomit it up. Let us dive in. Goggles on. SANCHEZ – 4.7 – CHELSEA Absolutely insistent on putting his defence under pressure again and again, RDZ literally sold this tosser because he couldn’t pass…
I apologize for not being able to write my Gameweek 15 article due to the extremely short turnaround time. However, there weren’t many players who could have made a big impact during that week. One of the most popular moves were Turner to Dubravka or Turner to Kelleher. If you followed my advice from my…
The deadline for Gameweek 14 is approaching, but before that, some crucial European fixtures await our FPL assets. Newcastle will play in Paris and need a favourable result to stay in the UCL. Manchester United must win against Galatasaray in Turkey to continue their run in Europe. Arsenal aims to secure top spot by winning…
Gameweek 13 of FPL is upon us after the international break, and we are now in a crucial phase of the season where active managers will be seeking to gain an edge over their less-engaged counterparts. However, the international break has thrown some curveballs with highly owned players such as Mitoma and Bowen potentially missing…
